Sickness.

I'm tired of being sick. Everything hurts. I found out I have scholiosis and my neck curves the wrong way. So pretty much my life suuuucks. I don't know why if you decide to stop being friends with someone or something stupid like that it becomes EVERYBODY's buisness. Why can't people just accept that I have my reasons. I'm not going to tell the world. Yeah. So everyone can think she's a bad person. No. I'm not going to do that. That's how stuff gets started. I just have my reasons. Everybody has reasons why they do things. Some people do too much. Some people just don't care. You didn't care. Bottom line. You care about you. That's great and all, you should care about yourself but you weren't my best friend. Morgan Osburn is my best friend. Not you. You are much too self centered & blame everybody else when it's not everyone else. You control your life. You make your own decisions. You don't care about me. You knew something happened and you acted like everything was fine. I don't understand why. How is it that you think I could recover from something like that in 20 minutes? What goes on in your head, I do not know. What I do know is that I don't have to be a part of it. And I don't have to give you a reason. You're a complete jerk and then two days later you're kissing my butt. I'm not having that. You're not a friend. You're just there.

I've got to get better. And I'll be better off without you.

Day Fourteen & Fifteen

A person I've drifted away from.
Taylor Marie Hinson. I miss you making me pee my pants.


The person I miss the most.
Eli Velazquez. Yeah. I said it. Won't ever say it again. But I miss my little puerto rican boy.
Sure he isn't perfect & always seems to think everyone wants his input, but he's still special to me.

Day thirteen.

Someone I wish would forgive me.

David Dick.
I think you're the only person who isn't in my life right now when I feel like they should be. Let's fix things. I doubt you'll read this, but it's important to me. I love you dude.

Days 7 through 12. (:

Since I was in Mexico for five days I'm catching up.

Day 7-
My ex boyfriend.
I really don't have much to say to you or about you.
You took everything. You left me nothing to hold onto.
I've built myself back up. I'm proud of being a strong person.
You're not. You're not a terrible person. Just selfish.
I don't hate you. But I'd never speak to you again if I had the chance.
I don't want anything to do with you. You're dead to me.

Day 8-

My favorite internet friend.

I've been really excited for this one! He won't be just an internet friend for long.<3 He's probably my favorite person on the face of this earth. He's got the most beautiful smile. He helps me through everything. I love him, probably more than he loves me. And when we finally meet, I'm gonna attack him. wiff hugs. :] he's the cutest thing. You're amazing, Luis Orellana. <3 I love you, sugar. (: can't wait for you to be close to me.

Day 9-
A person I wish I could meet.

see 'Day 8.' <3

Day 10-

Someone I don't talk to as much as I'd like to is my dad. He's important to me, whether he knows or not. It's just hard to always talk to him because I'm pretty busy but I'll do better.

Day 11-

A desceased person I wish I could talk to is my grandpa.

He was really silly & always made me laugh, but I wish I knew more about him.

Day 12-

The person I hate the most, who has caused me a lot of pain.

see 'Day 7'.

Bye.

Tonight.

Tonight was necessary. Very necessary.
I love my mother I think more than anyone else.

Day Six: A Stranger

Dear Stranger,
I don't know about you. I don't know what you do. I don't know who you are. I don't know if I ever will. Stranger, all I can tell you is I hope everything works out for you. Exactly the way you would like. I hope you get your dreams, and aspire to be a good person. Maybe one day, we won't be strangers.

Vent

Know what I hate? When girls act like you can't talk to someone because 'they were talking' a long time ago. FYI, you probably just thought you two were talking & you weren't. Meeting on myspace does not count. You can't freaking claim guys because you talked. & i'm not going to apologize for someone being interested in me because you have feelings for them. Especially if mine go farther back than yours. You can't claim every single freaking boy on this earth. If I wanna talk to someone I'm going to. They don't like you, suck it up.

Not everybody 'stopped talking to you because you wouldn't send them pictures.'
I highly doubt that.
Stop fishing for compliments. You know you're not fat or ugly.

GOOD GOD.

Day Five: Dreams

If I had any dreams I'd write about them.
Mostly I just don't want to end up alone.
I want somwone to prove that they love me.
That's what i dream of.

And maybe one day to go creepin with Mike Vinny & Pauly D [:

Day Four: My Sibling.

This lovely girl in the picture next to me would be my baby sister Morgan Catherine Glocker. Morgan is smart. She's a lot taller than I. Sometimes I'm positive the sky in her world is purple. She's weird. She keeps my secrets. I love her more than almost anyone I can think of. I worry about this child so much every single day for more than one reason. If anyone did anything to hurt her in any way, I know I wouldn't be able to hold back from doing absolutely everything I could to hurt them. I wouldn't know what to do with myself. She had her appendix taken out & I cried and cried and cried some more because she was crying. I felt stupid for it the whole time, but when my baby sister is in pain, I am too. Or at least my heart is. We're normal(ish). We fight. Argue. I've beaten her up. She's beaten me up. She's thrown things at me. Called me every name in the book. But in about five minutes I'm always over it. She means more to me than any person, posession, place, material thing. I'd give her my organs if she needed them. I would gladly die for my sibling. I may not always act like it. But I wouldn't think twice about it. I love her so much. And I know I'm a bad example for her but I have faith that she's smart enough to figure tihngs out for herself.

Day Three: My Parents

My mother's name is Shannon.
She's smart, and very beautiful.
Half of the time I know she does not mean what she says.
She carries the world on her shoulders.
I always feel like I'm disappointing her,
even when she tells me that she is proud of me.
Regardless of her differences I do love her.
She does everything she can for me.

Matthew is my father.
We are almost always disagreeing.
We like the same music most times.
That might be all we agree on.
I disappoint him regularly.
I don't see him enough.
I don't talk to him every day like I should.
I love him very much.

So I'm world's worst daughter. I know this.
I could do better. I could.
I suck at life, I know.
I'll make their lives easier at some point in time.

I have a step father named Josh.
He's quiet, but very nice.
And a step mother to be Tonya.
She's dingy, but very nice.
I wouldn't want to not have them around.

Qwerty.

I don't know what I'm doing or saying half of the time.
I think I'm lost.

Honestly, I'm just tired of people. Everyone thinks they know so much about me. They have no idea. Even most of my friends don't know how I really am. I wouldn't change that. I enjoy being kind of mysterious, but I'm not who everyone thinks I am, and honestly I have a bigger heart than I get credit for. I'm a sweet girl. I don't tolerate crap from people, but I'm a good person. I know I am. I don't care if you don't like me or what I do, but chances are you don't know half the things you say. I hate how poeple are so rude to others and don't think about it. You don't know what people deal with on a daily basis. You don't know what they go home to. You don't know if they have been victims of certain things. Or what kind of stress they're under.

Funny how you can make someone's day better with a smile.

Someone did that for me today. 'Hurd' was your last name, pretty boy at work tonight.

Thanks for your smile. It made me smile, & I thought I woudn't.

Day one: My Best Friend

I have a few best friends. Rachael Epperson, Ashton Cloud, Megan Stevens, & Jordan Harding. If I had to pick one, it's Morgan Kaye Osburn. She stands out in my mind differently. She keeps me safe, she loves me no matter what I do. I see her hurt sometimes & it breaks my heart. She has broken my heart by what she does to herself, but there's no telling what I would have done to myself if she weren't there to give me someone to hold onto. I love her. She's my other half. My BFUD.

thirty days

Day 1 — Your Best Friend






Day 2 — Your Crush



Day 3 — Your parents



Day 4 — Your sibling (or closest relative)



Day 5 — Your dreams



Day 6 — A stranger



Day 7 — Your Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush



Day 8 — Your favorite internet friend



Day 9 — Someone you wish you could meet



Day 10 — Someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to



Day 11 — A Deceased person you wish you could talk to



Day 12 — The person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain



Day 13 — Someone you wish could forgive you



Day 14 — Someone you’ve drifted away from



Day 15 — The person you miss the most



Day 16 — Someone that’s not in your state/country



Day 17 — Someone from your childhood



Day 18 — The person that you wish you could be



Day 19 — Someone that pesters your mind—good or bad



Day 20 — The one that broke your heart the hardest



Day 21 — Someone you judged by their first impression



Day 22 — Someone you want to give a second chance to



Day 23 — The last person you kissed



Day 24 — The person that gave you your favorite memory



Day 25 — The person you know that is going through the worst of times



Day 26 — The last person you made a pinky promise to



Day 27 — The friendliest person you knew for only one day



Day 28 — Someone that changed your life



Day 29 — The person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to



Day 30 — Your reflection in the mirror